I miss her and can't think straight

Day after day I fight against the desire to beg of her to talk to me. Because I know this might bother her. I just wanted to hear her voice. I wouldn't say anything if she doesn't want me to speak. Just want to hear her voice.

Why I ruined the only thing that brought me real joy in this cold life by telling her I love her? Maybe this is just a delusion like she says. But I don't care what this is. I just wanted to hear that voice. That's all. I wouldn't ask anything else.

(Very corny! Originally posted in April 6, 2013. Elsewhere.)

How I found out that she wasn't just a girl, but THE GIRL (Continuation)

I really don't know why I want her. And this is the point. I don't know why I want her in my life, but this is terrifying to think about life without her. I just realized one day that I would like to see her every day, to talk to her every day. I was kind of embarrassed for feeling this way. I was afraid of letting her know it. One day she got to know it...

I never felt this way in my life before. I didn't feel jealous, I just felt afraid, I just fear the idea of being away from her, but she lived miles away! I really don't understand this feeling. And you know what? I don't want to understand. I just want to be with her.

(Originally posted in April 2, 2013, elsewhere.)

How I found out that she wasn't just a girl, but THE GIRL

When I met her I said to myself, "Now, that's the girl that I've always wanted in my life." But she was so far away. And I thought to myself, "Perhaps I wouldn't be the best for her," for I was about 1864 miles away from her.

I'm very ashamed to say that when I was dating other girls I usually thought about the fact that I wasn't lucky enough to have near me that stunning girl that was 1864 miles away. And I'm very ashamed to say that I exaggerated in the praise of other girls.

How hypocrite I feel when I think that I was dating other girls only out of fear of loneliness. How coward I was! I mean, those girls were fine, I liked them, but it's such a shame to think that all that I wanted was for them to be like the girl that was 1864 miles away...

(To be continued...)

(Originally posted in January 16, 2013, elsewhere.)

To spend an afternoon with you

How many times I wished I could walk by the sea hand-in-hand with you. The pleasure of looking at you mingled with the sea breeze. To spend an afternoon with you... and to see the evening come, the stars spread out in the sky. You can't imagine how I dream of this moment... and later we would see the midnight come... and we would come intertwined all night long...

(Originally posted in June 23, 2013, elsewhere.)

How could I love her?

And this beautiful lady that captivated my eyes and heart asked me, "How could you love me if you do not know me?"

To answer her I employ the words of Van Helsing, one of my favorite fictional characters:

"Not know you! I, who am old, and who have studied all my life men and women; I, who have made my specialty the brain and all that belongs to him and all that follows from him! And I have read your diary that you have so goodly written for me, and which breathes out truth in every line. (...) Good women tell all their lives, and by day and by hour and by minute, such things that angels can read; and we men who wish to know have in us something of angels' eyes."

Extracted from Dracula by Bram Stoker, page 202. Slightly adapted.

(Originally posted in May 10, 2013, elsewhere.)

I would do anything you want me to, Baby

I would do anything you want me to do for you, Baby. I would do anything that can make you really happy. I can't guess what you want, 'cause you're so enigmatical and I'm no clairvoyant, but... I will surely try to find out what you really want deepest in your heart. What - you may not know - is more difficult than finding a needle in a haystack.

In fact, it's way more difficult than finding a needle in a haystack, it's more difficult than finding a needle in an ocean, but I just wanted to use the old saying first! I don't want to create a new expression, I just want to make you happy.

No! In fact, it's MORE DIFFICULT than finding a haystack in an ocean and then finding a needle in that haystack. I really would love you to see that, so that you could know exactly how I feel!!!

(Originally posted in August 3, 2013, elsewhere.)

She is my sun

There is still beauty. The same as I know that there is still light in the world, even when the sun is covered by black clouds, for the sun is still lighting the world from afar, from behind the clouds.

I walk around, I see around and I see beauty. I see beautiful women. But I know that I only can see beauty because of her, for she is my sun. In every woman I only perceive bodies, as if I perceived objects but couldn't see at all without the light of the sun.

This is the absurd condition in which I'm living.

(Originally posted in November 12, 2013, elsewhere.)